Been lazy to do write ups since the last update. Well, we did a scan and can see the little tadpole inside my tummy! I will be going into my 12 weeks gestation in a few days. Going for OSCAR scan on 31. I am very sure and confident that my little baby will be a warrior, just like its mum! Heee.... prob will show some pics of scan in later weeks as it grows bigger :)
Our founding father of Singapore, Mr Lee Kuan Yew was gone on 23 Mar 0318hrs. Saw the announcement on my mobile during my night duty. Although me and batch boys has been talking about his demise since last year and how we are all prepared for the day if it comes, I still felt a sense of surreal when I got the message.
True, I have my fair share of criticizing the raising transportation fees and its break down, the COEs, the raising HDB flat prices etc. But as I dive deeper into myself, I realized I have to be grateful. I have to be grateful that we have low crime rates, that I can safely walk on the streets at night. I can have the opportunity to study, to realized my potential if I want to... that is if I am persistent and determined enough. That we can travel around the island easily and have the best airport in the world. I always, always feel the most appreciative when I arrived back at Changi Airport. To see the efficient immigration system, to feel the carpet under my feet. To feel the warmth of my country.....yes, I am home!
I should be grateful that we have wonderful and skillful doctors and healthcare system. I don't worry if anything happens to me, I know I have the best medical team that I can count on.
There was a time when I was very patriotic, in my youth, in my teens, even as a young adult willing to sign on with RSN "For Duty, Honor, Country". I am willing to lay my life for Singapore!I would sing with pride all the national day songs in school, I even msg my friend on National Day just to share my enthusiasm. I believed everything the textbook teaches and bought whatever Mr Lee Kuan Yew said that we must do. 「政府很厲害，凡事交給政府就行了」，這也是在我成長的風平浪靜的歲月裡，自小被灌輸的觀念。
But as I got out of the force and to the society, with exposure on internet and alternative views, I started to wavier on my conviction. As I slowly see more and more foreigners beside me in the train, I thought... since when has Singapore become so crowded? Then the foreigners decided that they are very important and that Singapore will be doomed without them. They started to challenge our culture, our way of life. How dare them!This is my home and you jolly well blend in when you are at our home ground!
I started to criticize the government policies and joined the national pass time, complaining. To be frank, I do not see the future with the present incumbent. They are not as bad ass, as determined, as far-sighted as the old guards. They are not as self-sacrificing, as close to the ground as the old guards. Maybe the 2nd generation or even 3rd generation of leaders are like me. Grew up in a comfortable and safe environment. We do not know how to feels to be hungry, how it feels to live in a shelter that is in danger of being burnt down, how it feels not to have water from the tap at the comfort of your kitchen. Maybe...just maybe...we need to have a bloody overhaul for everybody to be put into what we have in perspective.
