Courage

Duhzz.... it happend to me AGAIN!! I've typed the entry almost to the last few sentences when it hang and all my work are gone.... *sob sob*. Now I will just write 1 topic.... -_-"...

A frend called me the other day on a problem he is facing. According to him, he felt I have always been 1 that can make very tough decisions *raise eyebrow*. Haa... I din know I gave ppl that kind of image. Well, this frend is a childhood frend and we have known each other since our teenage days. Maybe he saw me making all those controversial decisions that most ppl won't make bah. Like joining the Arm Forces, leaving the Arm Forces, setting my own biz, closing down the biz, joining the property industry and finally going back to the uniform line. Not fogetting my decisions on long-term relationships that lasted for years. Haaa... frankly speaking, I also dun know where I got all those courage from. But I believe you only lived once, and you should live it to the fullest. As long as you are happy.

There are ppl (like my mum) who would view all these decisions I made as irresponsible. Then what is being responsible? Do you think you will be happy if you make a certain decision because of obligation? Everybody has their own right to be happy, in their own ways. Nobody owe you your happiness other than yourself. It is up to you how you want to view that nasty incident you've encounter. That is what I always believe bah, you and only you is responsible for your happiness. Dun go ard blaming the heaven or earth on why the world is so unfair cos the world has never been fair. Snap out of it and face the fact. Although I do agree there are some responsibilities that is your duty to fulfill, something that you cannot run away from eg. to parents, to kids, to families. Especially to the kids. If you do not have the confidence to give your children the love and concern they need, then please, dun bring another life into the world to suffer......

What does it takes to make a decision that you know people ard you would disapprove of? Loads and loads of courage. My frend also asked me when is a good time to break bad news, ermm.... I told him there is no good time to break bad news...haaa something that I learnt recently :p . Is it easier to make the next tough decision after you've make the 1st one. Haaa... the answer is NO. Every decision has its own set of considerations. It will never be easy to make tough and unpopular decisions. If I were to say its easy for me to make all those decisions, I would be bluffing. I was frighten to step into the unknown, afraid of making a wrong choice. Frankly speaking, the toughest decision I make is still the most recent one. I still dun know if it is a correct choice, but it seems like the most viable option at that time. Though it caused a lot of inconvenience and disappointment among many people, I still believe it is up to the individual to handle the disappointment. It is not my obligation to make sure everybody is happy when I am not. It might be very selfish of me to say that, but come on, everybody is selfish in 1 way or another.

I can say all that, but for every "bad" decision I made, the amt of time to work out the courage is not within a short time frame. The only reason why I guess I could make those decisions is most probably due to the principles that I live by, "make your decision and bear all consquence for better or for worse" & "长痛不如短痛". What I can offer is to look for the courage to enable you to carry your decision through. It will take some time, but once you found the courage, there is no turing back. "Belief gives you Strength, Love gives you Courage".