Miss You

Did a very stupid thing today. I did not finish my exam. The ideas and theories are all in my head, but I just can't get anything out. I can't even string a sentence properly... and I think about you. Tears started flowing and I have to excuse myself to go to the ladies. I tot I could continue after letting go.... but I can't.

I tot I had it under control, that I can grieve all I want after today.. but I din make it. I did not have the time to grieve properly. I did not cry ever since the day he got into the accident, tearing, yes, but not crying. It felt so good that all is being let out. Lke the clearing of the tap, 1 gush, and everything was flashed away rather than tearing.. like the tap kana stuck like tt...haha. I miss you, and I will miss you. I kinda hate and envy you too. At least you are out of this dimension.... while I still have to suffer in it. It is really painful to see someone close to you go. Can I handle it when its my parents turn? What the fuck.... I hate LIFE!!

Dammit why the hell am I in this place? Can I just disappear? Dun even exist in any dimension? I m really sian, sian.... but what can I do except to look at the brighter side? What can I do except to live life fully since I am already here? What can I do except to handle the challenges that gets thrown into my face? I need a break......

Think I will be better prepared for my re-take bah. I should be ready by then...... Weicong, thanks for appearing in my life....Love you!